


Discworld Limericks

by swiddershins



Category: Discworld - Terry Pratchett
Genre: Gen, silliness in rhyme
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-05 22:34:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11022984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swiddershins/pseuds/swiddershins
Summary: What it says on the tin.





	1. Rincewind

There once was a wizzard subpar  
Whose only wish was to stay far  
From the danger and strife  
Of an int’resting life  
But trouble clung to him like tar.


	2. Nanny Ogg

There once was a woman named Ogg  
Who was really quite fond of her grog  
Though she was an old dear,  
It did well to stand clear  
When she started to sing of hedgehogs.


	3. Captain Carrot

There once was a dwarf six feet tall  
Who was dearly beloved by all  
Although maybe a king  
He cared not for such things  
And just heeded the night watch’s call.


	4. Reaper Man

Death once took a little vacay  
But the world very quick went cray-cray  
So he said “I’M THE REAPER  
THAT MAKES ME THE KEEPER  
OF THIS WORLD, SO I GUESS I MAY STAY.”


	5. Going Postal

There once was a con man quite clever  
Who, thanks to the good hangman’s lever,  
Fell out of the noose  
And into good use  
In charge of the Post and its letters.


	6. Monstrous Regiment

A gal once went off to enroll  
With a vampire, some lads and a troll  
Ill-prepared to be warriors  
They saw naught but horrors  
In war and in old gender roles.


	7. Sybil Ramkin

There once was a lady named Sybil  
Who used bits of charcoal as kibble  
For her dragony pets  
And their fiery blue jets  
Which could lead to unfortunate dribble.


	8. Sam Vimes

There once was a fellow named Vimes  
Who was truly a man of his times  
It was true he was rude,  
Badly shaven, ill-shoed,  
But steadfast in hunting out crimes.


	9. the Librarian

There once was a well-skilled librarian  
Who was quite a good bit more hairy than  
Your average scholar  
Though not at all taller  
And, when called monkey, barbarian.


	10. Vetinari

There once was a man from the city  
Who was carefully, fatally witty  
Throughout many years  
He maintained all the gears  
That kept his town afloat sans committee.


	11. Tiffany Aching

Though witches grow mostly on rock,  
There once was a girl from the Chalk  
Who said “I know where I stand  
And I know my own land  
And I’ll always take care of my flock.”


End file.
